DadLife – Page 2

NUFC in the last month June 1st to July 15th

Can I just say as a club Newcastle united are absolutely cooking btw just check out all of these announcements and highlights from the past month and a half!!

Men’s Team Highlights

Dan Burn was voted Player of the Season for 2024/25. Alexander Isak was nominated for the PFA Players’ Player of the Year.

Premier League fixtures for 2025/26 were released, with a blockbuster opener against Aston Villa on August 16.

Pre-season friendlies announced: Celtic, Espanyol, Arsenal, and Atlético Madrid.

Transfer activity: In: Anthony Elanga (£55m from Nottingham Forest) and Antonio Cordero (free from Málaga).

Out: Lloyd Kelly (permanent move to Juventus), Callum Wilson, Jamal Lewis, and John Ruddy (all released)2.

Behind-closed-doors friendly: Newcastle beat Carlisle United 4–0, with academy players and Joelinton scoring.

Hugo Ekitike pursuit: Ongoing negotiations for a potential record signing.

Women’s Team Highlights

Back-to-back promotions confirmed; now competing in the Women’s Championship or WLS 2 for another season.

New signings: Jemma Purfield (former Southampton full-back). Molly Pike (goalscoring midfielder from Southampton). Amy Andrews (striker from Durham). Deanna Cooper (ex-Chelsea and Reading defender). Jordan Nobbs (England legend) linked with a potential marquee signing.

Season tickets for 2025/26 went on sale and we got 4

Club-Wide Updates

Retained list published: Callum Wilson, John Ruddy, and Jamal Lewis released.

Mark Gillespie retained via contract option.

Lloyd Kelly’s loan to Juventus made permanent.

Paul Mitchell, sporting director, confirmed departure after securing Cordero’s signing.

New Head of Football Strategy: Jack Ross appointed.

Champions League qualification and Carabao Cup win celebrated as part of club’s strongest season in decades.

We aren’t even finished !!

HOWAY THE LADS!!!

HOWAY THE LASSES!!!

Thursdays: Wands Wookie’s and Wipeout’s 002

🧙 My Lightsaber Is Actually a Remote: The Jedi Arts of Channel Control

In our galaxy, the remote is more than tech—it’s a wand, a peacekeeper, a beacon of compromise. And wielding it? That’s pure Jedi.

I used to think I had control. Then came Bluey marathons and YouTube wormholes. Channel sovereignty became a rare artefact, like the Darksaber—spoken of, seldom seen. But here’s the trick: Jedi don’t dominate. They persuade, guide, and sometimes make room for Ewok dance breaks if it brings balance to the Force.

I’ve learned to rotate screen time like a training regimen—cartoons one day, nature docs the next, with detours through football replays for parental sanity. Sometimes, we co-watch and I sneak in dad jokes that would make Yoda groan.

And when the tiny Padawans clash? That’s when my calm Jedi dad voice comes out: “There is no fight, only sharing.” It doesn’t always work. But neither did Obi-Wan’s first try with Anakin.

⚽ Sunday: The Toonverse Chronicles: 001

Week 1

Why I’m Raising a Black-and-White Wizard

The first item of baby clothing I bought? A mini NUFC shirt. Not a bottle, not a onesie. A Toon top. Because for me, football isn’t just about sport—it’s about belonging.

Welcome to The Toonverse Chronicles, where passion meets parenthood, and raising a Newcastle fan becomes an emotional training montage worthy of the empire strikes back—but with more wafer thins.

🪄 The Magic of It All:
Our bedtime stories alternate between Alan Shearer and Albus Dumbledore. We celebrate goals like spell-casting victories. Somewhere between match replays and wand battles, my little one started to get into it.

⚽ Lessons from the Gallowgate End:
– Loyalty isn’t about never losing—it’s about never walking away.
– Tradition matters—rituals like wearing black and white or doing silly half-time dances are part of family identity.
– Hope, even when we’re 2–0 down in life, makes everything worthwhile.
– Raising the little one like the Carabao Cup whilst she is giggling and I like every other Geordie is on cloud nine – Priceless.

💡 Favourite Moment:
The day I got to put my youngest in her first proper toon top. there is nothing like it.

🏁 Full-Time Thoughts:
It’s not just football. It’s not just parenting. It’s shared belief. And that, to me, is a kind of magic. It is going to be a magic we all feel when we start going to the lasses matches next season as the youngest is just about old enough now.

🚀 Saturday: Mission Logs 001

Log 001: First Contact with Sleep Deprivation

Stardate: Week 3 of parenting my 4-week-early little girl.
Log Entry: Time: 01:13. Status: Half-dressed half-asleep. Tea: Redundant. Partner sleeping, just, waiting for the 3am feed time.

This is the first of my Mission Logs—personal, unfiltered dispatches from the frontlines of dad hood. I’ll be honest: nothing prepared me for the wild silence of a sleeping Mamnaut and baby… except maybe training in sleep deprivation while on guard duty.

💤 The Incident:
It was approaching midnight, and the bottle was prepped there was a sleepy silence throughout the house. It was now time to awaken the shrieking shack!

🔦 My Survival Tips:
– Embrace the behaviour exhibited by the Mamnaut, speak softly cuddle the little one in and slowly wake up the mamnaut. The goal is to head upstairs!
– Accept imperfect wins. There had been screaming and named football chants sung like lullabies but I was now ready to feed the little one.
– Create a sleep pattern that works: Mamnaut slept from 10-12 am on the sofa, we went to bed at midnight and then the Mamnaut had a broken sleep until 2:30 am to prep the 3 am feed, and I slept from 1 am until 5:30 am ready for the 6 am feed! It isn’t perfect but we are getting used to it!

🚀 Status Report:
We made it through. Slightly haunted, heavily caffeinated, and—surprisingly—more connected to my little one than ever. It’s funny how the hardest moments teach us the most about love especially when you are looking down at them having a feed at 12:30 am when everything in the world feels calm again.

🚀 Welcome Aboard the Dadnauts Mission💂‍♂️

Hello, I’m Darren—a former Guardsman turned full-time dad, part-time blogger, full-time nerd and full-time worker!

I started Dadnauts to document a mission that never really ends: raising kids while staying true to your passions, personality, and even your inner Jedi.

This isn’t just a parenting blog. It’s a transmission from the edge of chaos and creativity—where matchdays collide with nappy changes, lightsabers turn up in the sock drawer, and bedtime feels more like a boss battle than a routine. If that sounds familiar, you’re in the right place.

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🧭 Why “Dadnauts”?

I wanted a word that captured the sense of exploration that comes with fatherhood. Something that said, “you might not know what you’re doing, but you’re giving it everything you’ve got.” Like an astronaut being handed a pram and a banana-streaked toddler and sent to explore Sector 7B (otherwise known as “soft play”).

Dadnauts is about navigating the unpredictable, blending your past with your present, and finding joy in the small victories—like a warm cup of tea or a goal scored during nap time.

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🗓 What You’ll Find Here

To keep this space fun, focused and useful, I’m sharing four different blog series, there will be one post per series a week. Here’s the mission roster:

🛠 Wednesdays — Dadnaut Toolkit
From time management to snack diplomacy, these posts offer field-tested ideas to stay sane, creative, and intentional. It’s the Guardsman in me, still drawing up plans and finding structure—just now there are bottles and lots of routine changes involved.

🪄 Thursdays — Wands, Wookies & Wipeouts
Where fandom meets family life. We’ll dive into Hogwarts house parenting styles, Star Wars snack tactics, and those moments when your kid refers to you as “Darth Dadious.”

🚀 Saturdays — Mission Logs
These are honest weekly reflections from the thick of it. No sugar-coating. Just the real stuff—wins, fails, funny bits, and everything in between.

⚽ Sundays — The Toonverse Chronicles
Football means something different when you’re introducing it to your kids. Expect black-and-white pride, bedtime chants, and reflections on passing down a sense of community, belonging and belief.

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🫡 Who This Is For

If you’ve ever changed a nappy with one hand while holding a toy wand in the other—welcome aboard.

If you’ve tried to sneak in writing time after bedtime but got ambushed by your own exhaustion—you’re not alone.

And if you believe being a dad doesn’t mean giving up your interests but growing into them with your kids—you’re a fellow Dadnaut already.

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📡 What Comes Next

The first Dadnaut Toolkit post drops this Wednesday—followed by fandom chaos on Thursday, reflection on Saturday, and football & fatherhood on Sunday.

Until then, grab a cuppa, scroll through the mission logs, and maybe follow along on X @Dadnauts for sneak peeks, outtakes, and snack-fuelled side quests.

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Thanks for being here,
Darren
Former Guardsman, Current coordinator, full-time Dadnaut!

https://twitter.com/dadnauts?s=09